Happy Trick
by Alkoi
Summary: Dave gets turned Trickster, Bro rethinks his actions as a guardian, John realizes maybe both Cool Dave and Trickster Dave make his insides all mushy, and Trickster Dave already knows he wants to claim his Johnny-boy. This is an AU where Bro survives and Trickster Mode is not contagious. DavexJohn
1. Chapter 1

Dave shuddered. Groaning and whimpering as he clutched his head, writhing on the floor of his room in pain. Biting his bottom lip as he tried to keep himself from screaming.

He didn't even know what had happened to cause this! He had bumped into this weird looking kid a few hours ago. Who- thinking it was his fault and not Dave's, had given him an enormous swirly sucker, and promptly ran off giggling.

… It also seemed as if the person knew him. But Dave knew that was impossible and simply believed the guy just acted over-familiar with anyone.

He had gone home, and after having it checked by Bro – Dave had to be sure the guy hadn't drugged it or some shit. Dave hadn't learnt that yet.- Bro had given it the okay, and because that thing looked freaking fantastic, Dave had eaten it...

All of it.

And three minutes later, here we are, with Dave sobbing into his knees as he curls up in pain.

Dave clutched his legs so tight his knuckles were bone white, eyes clamped shut, he did not realise what was happening...

Dave's pale blonde hair was slowly becoming a bright teal. Green swirls emerging on his cheeks, behind his eyelids the iris became a light pink with a black spiral design.

His red, black and white record t-shirt had turned yellow on the sleeves, and the record on it had gone pink. Black skinny jeans became light pink, and red converses turning deep green with yellow laces. Normal sunglasses replaced with pink heart shaped ones with dark red tinted lenses

Dave had lost the fight with trying to keep himself silent and wailed in pain.

Loud footsteps could be heard sprinting towards Dave's room. The door slammed open and Bro barged into the bedroom.

"Dave what the fu-...Dave!" Bro started, but saw Dave lying on the ground. Limp and breathing heavily. Face hidden by teal hair, and rushed forward towards his little brother/ectobiological son.

Falling onto his knees Bro slid an arm around Dave's shoulders. Lifting him into a sitting position, Dave's head lolled into his chest, making his heart jump as he watched Dave's unresponsive body.

"C'mon kid, wake up lil' man...C'mon..." Bro shook him frantically. Receiving nothing he started to check him over. Mind going almost silent as his panic focused his thoughts solely on making sure his little bro was okay.

The persterchum program on Dave's computer trilled.

Bro looked up after making sure Dave was only unconscious and not dying or ill.

He was worried though, why did Dave look so different, and what the hell was up with his clothing?!

Bro slowly got up with Dave in his arms, lying him on the bed and walking over to his brothers computer.

– – tentacleTherapist [ TT ] began pestering turntechGodhead [ TG ] at 13:23 – –

TT : Hello, Dave.

TG : sup rose

TT: I heard that you still haven't confessed to John yet, how long are you going to drag this out?

TG: dude rose you know how he is always saying he isnt a homosexual or some crap.

TG: I confess and he wont talk to me EVER again.

TT: Are you sure? I've heard from Jade that he might have a crush on you.

TG: yeah where did she hear that?

TT: I don't know, all she keeps saying to to get you and John together, as soon as possible.

TG: like thatll ever happen john is as straight as an ruler straight out the factory

TG: so straight its cutting edge

TG: straighter than a freaking homophobe

TT: Aren't you exaggerating a slight amount?

TT: I know John is always telling you he isn't a homosexual.

TT: But haven't noticed the suspicious blush on his face whenever you mention something that insinuates a relationship?

TG: flush of fury man you seen the trolls talking about quadrants and pale shit and stuff?

TG: yeah well in troll terms so you and your lovely gf kanaya understand

TG:he is so pale for me that it is like paler than a paper white sheet

TG: get it?

TT: Yeah I understand how you might get that sort of idea

TG: one sec I suddenly feel hella sick

TG: what the fujl;

TT: Dave? Are you okay? What's happened?

TT: Dave? Are you there?

TT: Answer me Dave! Dave?!

TG:Hey this is lil' man's friend Rose right?

TT: Who is this? You, unlike Dave know how to type properly.

TT: Is Dave alright?

TG: This is his big brother, Bro, and I have no idea if he is alright or not. Cause he was screaming in pain on the floor when I came in and then he passed the fuck out.

TG: He looks absolutely insane as well, his hair is bright green and he has green swirls tattooed on his cheeks or something.

TT: Oh dear, is he wearing outrageously bright clothing? Does he have something stuck to his hair?

TG: Yes to the bright ass clothing, but something stuck to his hair?

TT:Like a candy, or a food or some sweet thing.

TG:Let me check.

– turntechGodhead has gone idle – –

Bro stood up quickly, turning to his brother and looking at him again.

He now noticed a large strawberry that sat on the right side of Dave's head, looking like it was going absolutely nowhere.

He tugged on it, not a single bit of movement, the thing seemed as if it was literally grafted onto Dave's head, now even more worried.

Quickly sitting back down at his brothers computer Bro began typing again.

– - turntechGodhead is no longer idle – –

TT: Well?

TG: Yeah, there was a strawberry fucking grafted to the right side of his head.

TT: I was hoping this wasn't the case.

TT: When he came back from his walk, did he have this really big spiral sucker on him?

TG: Yeah, he got me to check it over in case there was anything weird in the thing.

TG: Why did that thing cause this?

TG: And what the hell is this anyway?

TT: Damnit, this is not good at all.

TT: That giant sweet sucker causes people to activate their 'Trickster' modes.

TT: It gives them enormous power boosts.

TT: But they act painfully happy all the time, and they are quite psychotic.

TT: It wears off...slowly, very, very slowly.

TT: All I can say is that you should keep Dave as happy as possible, as well as keep any and all confectioneries AWAY.

TG: Your telling me until this shitty thing wears off I'm going to have a psychotic lil bro?

TT: He will be extremely hyper and dorky- not like that is much of a change, but as well as switching emotions at the flick of a switch. He will have enough strength to snap you in two if he tried hard enough.

TT: I don't exactly know if I am exaggerating or underestimating the power boost.

TT: But from what I have seen it seems very likely I am correct.

TG: So I'm going to have to survive a power-monger kid-on-a-sugar-high Dave for however long it takes for the damn sucker power to wear off?

TG: Shit.

TT: I'm sorry, but that is all I can help you with, I wish you good luck, I'll tell the others to avoid angering Dave.

TT: At all, for as long as possible, for now goodbye. Bro.

TG: Yeah, see you little Roxy.

TT: ...I am not my mother, goodbye.

– – tentacleThreapist [ TT ] ceased pestering turntechGodhead [ TG ] at 13:36 – –

Bro sighed, closing the pesterlog and turning the computer off. He now felt resigned. His Dave, his lil' man would be acting completely off for the next...however long...

He would have to hide the smuppets and Lil Cal if Dave didn't like them still, if only to make sure nothing happened with him.

...Also, apple juice, tons of apple juice.

He stood, walking over to Dave where he was lying, looking completely at ease as he slept.

Bro sat down at the edge of the bed, reaching out to stroke Dave's hair gently.

"Well, little man, guess I'm gonna have to get you a tonna apple juice to keep you happy. Hell I should have done that beforehand rather stuffing my swords in the fridge with nothing consumable in there. When was the last time I went grocery shopping? Fuck, when was the last time we had a home cooked meal?" Bro said, carding his hand through the soft teal locks.

Dave seemed to smile goofily in his sleep, curling up and shuffling closer to his big brother.

"I'm a terrible bro, huh? Strifes and smuppets when I should be makin' sure you're happy." Bro sighed, gently lifting Dave into his lap, resting his head on his shoulder and shuffling back to lean against the wall.

A few minutes later, Dave's smile had become even larger. His eyes had opened behind the sunglasses that had slipped down his nose, revealing the odd pink eyes.

"Huaa...? Broooo...Why are you HUGGING mee?" He asked, with a dorky looking grin as he looked up at Bro, voice sounding absolutely gleeful.

"You fainted, lil' man, wanted to make sure you were right as rain when you woke up." Bro replied easily, shuffling as Dave wrapped his arms tightly around his middle.

"Awwww! You're the BEST big bro ever!" He squealed, Bro felt his breath getting short as the wiry arms unnatural strength became obvious.

"That's awesome you think that lil' man, but if you could let your best big bro breath that would be appreciated!" He almost wheezed, Dave laughed loudly, arms slipping from the death hug with Bro and stared up at him with an elated grin.

"Sooooorrrryyyyyyy! Hahahahaha, I just HAD to show my appreciation for caring y'know!" Dave giggled happily, shifting as his brother wriggled to sit straighter against the wall. Looking into the anime shades on the larger Strider.

"Hey, lil' man, do you like the Smuppets and Lil Cal always being around the house?" Bro decided to get it done quickly, rather than learn if so later on.

Dave's grin did slightly fall, eyes flashing with what looked like fear. "Weeeeeellll, they ARE pretty creepy, y'know Bro? Aaaaalways appearing out of nowhere, kinda like one moment they're not there..." He curled his hands into what looked light claws and lunged jokingly at Bro. "Then suddenly BOO! They aare!"Dave whined, looking up at Bro with an adorable pout on his face.

"I'll go put them away in my closet then, if it bothers you so much." Bro assured Dave, who's eyes brightened significantly and he grasped his biceps excitedly.

"REAALLY?!" Dave squealed happily, crazily elated eyes staring out at him, as Dave had pushed his sunglasses up to rest on top of his.

Bro nodded, Dave laughed delightedly, and hugged him tightly again.

"YAY!"

Oh dear god this was going to be terrifying...

Bro Strider, killed by the hyperactivity of Dave Strider under trickster sugar rush influence...

Great.

Wow I wrote this in one sitting, sheeeeesh that was cool.

Okay, so I know this is different than Homestuck, it is an AU, Bro survived because I LOVE HIM AND THAT SHIT WAS WAY TOO GOD DAMN SAD.

So yeah, this is Pepsicola or otherwise known as Hammertime or DavexJohn/JohnxDave.

Have you noticed how much I ship yaoi couples?

I have.

It's unhealthy.

I hope you like it, it is going to be slow updates as I am currently rewriting my crossover story, please review and favourite.

Constructive criticism is very much appreciated as well as compliments as that is mega motivation.

Alkoi


	2. Chapter 2

Dave giggled wildly as he hopped up and down, watching as Bro gathered up his smuppets around the house. Systematically picking them up and apologizing to them before he stuffed them into bags.

It was hilarious and gave Dave a rush of happiness that before the WONDERFUL treat he had been given by that stranger he never had. All because Bro was getting rid of the scaaaryyy smuppets just for him.

Bro had finally gotten rid of all the smuppets and stuffed them into his rooms closet. Except for Lil Cal, who he was having a deep stare down with, face serious and hand on the hilt of his katana.

"Now, Lil Cal, I'm sorry man but I gotta keep you in my room from now on, but whenever I go out to a gig I'll make sure to bring you." Dave giggled harder, floating upwards slightly as he clutched his stomach. Watching his big brother say goodbye to the puppet.

Lil Cal was then taken from his perch inside the fridge, and disappeared into Bro's room.

Dave watched, on the verge of hysterical laughter when Bro looked into the bare faced fridge.

"Fucking hell, the only thing we have in the fridge is a three year old canned tuna- oh GOD WHAT THE HELL IS THAT?!" Bro threw himself away from the tuna can as soon as it was taken out of the fridge and put onto the counter.

The tuna can had gotten so old that it had fallen apart as soon as it hit the counter. Brown lumps falling out of the foul smelling container, the reek wafted through the room. Dave immediately stopped laughing, coughing at the disgusting smell.

"Abscond! Lets get the fuck out of here and buy some god damn Fabreeze or some shit... along with some groceries..." Bro groaned, plugging his and Dave's nose, opening all of the windows and closing all the doors behind them.

"Sheeeeeeeesshh, that was disguuuuusting! WHY did that tuna smell so baaad!" Dave whined, stomping his foot as soon as Bro and he had left their home and had let go of both their noses.

"It was in there for like three years, it went bad ages ago... I should have noticed it was there... point 3 to me in shitty parenting." Bro sighed, stuffing his hands into his pockets and looking at Dave, who was smiling very giddily.

"You're the best parent ever, best bro ever, EVEEERRRR." His voice was high pitched and cute. Bro realised Dave sounded 9 again and smiled, reaching out with the hand closest to Dave and ruffled his teal hair.

"Cute, lil' man, I guess you don't realise how bad I am at this big bad parenting shtick... Hell I beat you up for most of your life." Bro grumbled half-heartedly.

Dave looked up at him through heart-shaped sunglasses, and grinned almost maniacally.

"You're the best brooo eeveeerrrr, and if ANYONE says otherwise..." He giggled wildly, holding his mouth and stomach. Finishing his sentence with such conviction it sent a slight shiver down Bro's spine.

"I'll kill them." Dave purred darkly, grin a little sharper than his usual bright ones.

"Kid, you don't need to do that." Bro assured him. tugging the brightly dressed boy into a short hug, that Dave extended with binding arms that entwined around his waist.

"Okaay Big Brooothheerrr." Dave giggled, snuggling into his chest, before smiling up at him. He started dancing down the road, stopping every once in a while to make sure Bro kept up. "Hurrryyy UP slow-poooooke! Or I'll leave ya in the duuuuust!" He sung jubilantly, watching as Bro groaned.

"A Strider always takes life as it comes lil' bro, I rarely rush..." Bro yawned, covering his mouth, "That, and I woke up way earlier than usual." He added, causing Dave to giggle.

"A big bro is always looking out for his liiittle broo! C'mon big Bro!" He hopped from one foot to the other, a big grin splitting his face.

"Dave!" An unsure voice called from the other side of the road, causing both Bro and Dave to turn their heads in said direction, seeing...

"JOHNNY-BOOOOOOOOYYY!" Dave squealed, actually flying across the road to tackle John Egbert in a tight hug. "You didn't ever mention you'd be viiiiisiiitiiiing! I could have plaaaannned!" He lamented childishly, a cute pout on his face.

The average sized, lanky boy chuckled weakly from under him. Blue eyes closed in slight pain as he wrapped his thin, pale arms around Dave's colourful shoulders.

"I wanted it to be a nice surprise Dave! … Dave... are you wearing heart-shaped sunglasses?" John asked suddenly, looking into Dave's eyes, or into his sunglasses at least.

Dave blushed and smiled happily.

"Yeah, I look cuuuuuute don't I?" He giggled hard, standing and pulling John up by the hands, entwining his own with John's. As soon as John was standing he looked John up and down.

Average height with an adorable lanky body, fluffy spikes of jet black hair. Skin milky white and eyes such a deep blue Dave almost got lost in the intensity, framed by rectangular glasses.

He was wearing dark blue jeans, red and yellow shoes, a light blue hoodie with a breeze icon on it. He had als been holding a rather large, goofy looking hammer.

"And..so do yoooooou..." Dave almost purred, Slinking closer to John and talking into his ear. Then jumping away and using the hold he had on both of John's hands to twirl around with him happily. "You are adoooorable! Adorkable ABSOLUTELY cuuuuuuuuuuute!" He shrieked, John watched the cool kid in shock...

This was WAY different than expected.

When Rose told him about the trickster problem he had no idea it would be this much of a change of Dave's usual behavior. But he guessed he should have considering the freaky behaviour of Jake, Jane and Roxy when they were hyped up on Trickster Mode.

Bro smirked, watching the two, after reading Dave's pesterlog he knew about Dave's love for the short Egbert.

Flash-stepping over to the other side of the road he watched as Dave started floating. John following, Bro cleared his throat to gain the attention of the both of them.

Dave look at Bro who was leant against a street light, smirking at him and pointing at John who was staring at Dave's attire in shock. Dave went bright pink and lowered himself and John to the ground, hugging John and grinning cheerfully at Bro.

John blushed as he was pulled into soft arms, hugged tightly and tucked into Dave's neck.

"Look Bro! My pretty Johnny!" Dave lilted, lifting John up in his arms and walking up to Bro, who pushed his triangular shades up and nodding.

"Good job, lil' man." He praised, at the sound of Bro's deep tenor John realised what it looked like with him in Dave's arms and started trying to wriggle free. Dave sighed heavily, pouting as he set John down on the ground and let go of him.

"Daaave." John whined. Crossing his arms and looking up at him in what Dave could only describe as mega-freaking-ADORKABLE! With his buckteeth sticking out from under his top lip.

"I am not a homosxual!" He said for at least the millionth time- John knew this was a pathetic excuse by now, a running gag that wasn't funny anymore.

Dave frowned, looking darkly at John from behind his sunglasses. Knowing that claiming his Johnny-boy would be a pain if he kept denying him. Homosexuality didn't even come into it Dave thought angrily, he's mine and he'll be mine forever, MINE MINE MINE. Dave almost growled inside of his head, shoving the nagging of Original-Dave ( Cool-Dave. )

Original-Dave could shove being cool down his damn throat. Johnny-boy and Bro were his and he would kill to make sure they stayed that way.

John and Bro looked a little worried as Dave suddenly looked mutinous.

"Lil'man?" Bro prodded Dave, who instantly giggled and hugged Bro as tight as he could without breaking him. Snuggling into his chest and grinning wide at the both of them.

"Yeeeeeees?!" He asked joyfully, watching Bro wince and loosening his hold on his big brother.

"You alright?" John asked, looking at how Dave snuggled closer to the elder Strider, heart panging slightly for some reason.

Dave smiled further, Johnny was worried about him? Yay!

"I'm a dandy daisy Johnny-boy!" He sung, pulling away from Bro and dancing dorkily in front of the both of them. "See?"

"Okay..." John nodded. Looking at the now straightened up Bro Strider, holding up a hand and waving at the taller man "Hello, Mr. Strider." He greeted finally, better late than never huh?

Bro nodded towards the black haired boy, before quickly walking to catch up with Dave who was now skipping to the store without him. Calling back to John.

"You wanna come with us? Need'ta get food and stuff, you have a place to stay or do you wanna sleep in Dave's room? We have a spare futon somewhere." John blinked in surprise at the question, picking up the large hammer and running over to follow the two brothers.

"Well I wasn't planning on staying a whole day, but the others probably wouldn't mind hahaha." John laughed awkwardly, scratching the back of his head and Dave fell back to walk next to him.

"You can stay right? Right right right RIGHT?!" He jumped up and down next to him. Hands clasped together and face contorted into an over exaggerated pleading expression.

John took out his phone, tapping the pesterchum on it.

– ectoBiologist [ EB ] started pestering gardenGnostic [ GG ] at 09: 17 –

EB: jade, do you mind if i stay with dave for a few days?

GG: yeah sure! How long are you going to stay?

EB: i dunno, maybe five days.

GG: awww im going to miss you! but sure, have fun!

GG: but be careful though, trickster dave might be more dangerous than you think!

EB: dont worry ill be fine jade.

EB: hes just really clingy and happy.

EB: all the time.

GG: okay! gotta go, bye!

– gardenGnostic [ GG ] ceased pestering ectoBiologist [ EB ] at 09:21 –

John put his phone back into his pocket and nodded to Dave.

"I'm staying for around 5 days, give or take." He informed, Dave cheered and did a flip in the air, landing on his feet and then hugging John.

"Did'ya hear that big Bro! He's staaaaaying!" Dave sung, looking up at Bro who was walking behind them.

"I heard, better get out the old futon... Do you not like apple juice or pizza, John?" Bro asked, looking at John who shook his head.

"No, I'm fine with that, but I'm allergic to peanuts." John replied, smiling at Bro who nodded slightly.

"Kay, we wont be having pizza all the time anymore though Dave, Strider's are healthy, and I've been neglecting your diet." He said seriously, Dave pouted.

"Aww..." He then perked up, and nodded "Aaaanything for you big bro!"

They arrived at the store soon later, Dave had to be held back from tackle-hugging a small dog that was tied up in front of the shop. Quickly going inside.

John had to keep himself from blushing, he had to hold Dave's hand to keep him from wandering off.

Bro walked about the aisles with them trailing after him, a shopping cart being maneuvered in one hand and his phone in the other. He kept looking from the phone to the aisles and sometimes picking things up to put in the cart.

Dave and John both noticed it, but only Dave decided to ask what he was doing.

"Why are you cooonstantly looking at your phone? Is there a special thing or something? I wanna see!" He asked loudly, gaining odd looks from some of the passing shoppers for his speech and appearance.

"Jane is helping me shop." Bro answered simply, tapping the screen and typing replies to what Jane was saying to him.

Dave burst into giggles, and John had to hold back a laugh.

Who knew the unbeatable Bro Strider didn't know how to shop for groceries properly.

Bro simply sighed, he hadn't gone food shopping in years...

Thank god Jane was there.

– timaeusTestified [ TT ] started pestering gutsyGumshoe [ GG ] at 09:29 –

TT: Sup, Jane.

TT: I need your help, I'm in a grocery store.

TT: What do I buy for a weeks worth of food?

GG: Are you serious?

GG: You? In a grocery store?

TT: I know, so surprising it isn't even ironic.

TT: Help me.

GG: Okay, so what have you got so far?

TT: A shopping cart.

GG: … Okay, what haven't you got in your fridge?

TT: Food, and drinks.

GG: Nothing, you have absolutely nothing in your fridge.

GG: Am I reading this correctly?

TT: I have nothing in my fridge.

TT: Bare as the back of a bald man's head.

GG: I'll give you a list of what you'll need.

TT: Thanks.

GG: Meats, milk, eggs, cheese, butter/margarine, juice, bread, jams, vegetables, fruits. What do you have in your cupboards?

TT: Nothing..

GG: ...What do you even eat at your house, furniture? Nevermind.

GG: Get cereal for your cupboards. A cookbook or two, canned vegetables, some quick to make things like fast noodles and ready made dinners. And whatever else you think is healthy or would be nice to have really,

TT: Thanks for the help.

GG: I don't want to know why you have only just now decided to start eating like a normal person.

GG: But I am glad I could help.

TT: Gotta go, John is trying to keep Dave from wandering off again.

GG: Okay, take care!

– timaeusTestified [ TT ] ceased pestering gutsyGumshoe [ GG ] at 19:24 –

While they had been walking down the vegetable and fruit aisle. Dave had spotted the strawberries, and was desperately trying to get over to them. Whining and pulling and stomping as John had grabbed him. Keeping him still and stopping him from moving any further towards the strawberries.

"Dave please stop struggling!" John pleaded, trying to keep a grip on Dave as he complained.

"Joooooooohhnnn! STRAAAWBERRIES! C'mooooon!" Dave cried, before pausing for a moment, leaning towards him suavely "I'll share with yoooou..." John blushed deep red, before blinking dumbly as Dave grinned victoriously, out of his now loosened grip.

Dave turned to run to the strawberries, only to run into a soft polo shirt and hard chest.

"Careful there, lil' man." Bro said, casually holding Dave in the crook of his arm while he used a free hand to grab a bag of potatoes. Looking at Dave who was glaring maliciously up at him, he felt a sharp prickle slide down his neck, shuddering. "You wanted strawberries, yeah? How many?" he added, looking down at Dave who instantly started grinning jubilantly.

"Sooo many! I want them AAALLL!" Dave slide out from Bro's hold and spread his arms wide. Almost hitting a passer-by in the process who grumbled angrily and walked even faster.

John watched them, Bro seemed different. The last time he met Bro he was silent and stoic and had dragged Dave up to the roof of the building they lived in to strife.

But it was cute to see Dave acting so happy around Bro. It was also endearing to see the older brother show affection for his little brother. Even if his facial expressions barely changed at all.

Bro chuckled, making his way to the boxes of strawberries.. Peering down before grabbing at least seven boxes and placing them into the cart.

Dave's smile grew wider, showing all of his teeth, he could feel his cheeks aching from the smiling he was doing but he cared not! His bro was soooooo nice! And Johnny-boy was here and being adorkable and oh god he was soooo HAPPY!

Noted Original-Dave, who was crammed into the back of his mind was also quite happy. But still was freaking the fuck out because some freaky happy-sweet juju was acting all kinds of hellish dorkiness in his body. Seriously what in the world were the heart-framed sunglasses he was wearing and oh damn his HAIR was-

Trickster Dave ignored the incredulous whining of the Original-Dave. It was simply an annoying buzzing in the back of his head that he could easily ignore.

He knew he would not be here forever. So he wanted to have the most fun he could possibly have while making sure Johnny-boy knew exactly what he felt...

That and he was very aware that Original-Dave felt the same way and wanted to make sure he saw all the marks HE was making on his love. Trapped inside his own body... Trickster-Dave didn't hate Original-Dave. No he just wanted to get rid of the fear that Johnny-boy wouldn't be theirs.

While Trickster-Dave was obsessing. John had approached Bro, and coughed to get the attention of the pale blond who was comparing two bags of onions.

"Mr. Strider?" John said next, when the older man nodded to show he was listening.

"Just call me Bro, John." Bro interrupted, John bobbed his head in nervous agreement.

"Okay...uh, Bro, I was just wondering if it's really okay for me to stay at your place I mean I could-" John started. Bro snorted softly and shook his head.

"Dave wants you there, and with how he is right now I don't know what he'll do if his 'Johnny-Boy' isn't with him. That and it's not any problem anyway I don't mind the lil' man brining his friends over." Bro assured him.

Dave's smile softened just slightly. He had inched towards them and had overheard their conversation, he loved how his Bro was now. And hoped that he never stopped being the amazing big brother he was.

Ten minutes later they had finished their rounds of the store and were now paying for the stuff. Dave was waiting for them as John and Bro bagged the goods and paid.

They ended up with six bags, and Bro carried two in each hand while Dave held the last two which were the lightest out of the bunch. John looked between them as they were walking back to the Strider home and slapped his hand to his mouth to keep a snort from escaping.

Dave tilted his head and looked at John, sunglasses sliding down his nose slightly to show his pink swirly eyes. ( Just to clarify, his iris is pink and he has a black spiral design on his iris that spirals into his pupil. ) John blushed, he didn't do a very good job at hiding his amusement.

"What's funny? Is it a joke?! Jooooohnnn, tell meee!" Dave whined, eyebrows pinching together in what was a very pouty puppy-dog face.

"It's just, you and Bro look so unique and kinda strange. No offence, and you're just carrying shopping bags and-" John snorted again, giggling at the image in his head. "You would be really weird house-wives!" He burst into laughter, clutching his stomach and bending over slightly.

Bro rose an eyebrow, looking at Dave who was now giggling at what John had said.

"I wouldn't be a housewife..." Bro started, smirking as he quickly put the bags down and took his cap off. Running his hand through his hair he placed a hand on his hip and added "I'd be THE Housewife." John and Dave had been watching, and had then promptly fallen over into uncontrollable fits of laughter.

"Oh...my...god..." John wheezed through his laughs, "I...cant...BREATHE!" He fell into the shaking, silent laughs that you would only do when you couldn't stop laughing but had no breath to create any noise.

Dave was still giggling crazily, holding his stomach and curling up slightly "It huuuurts! Pfftt-HAHAHAHA THE HOUSWIFE!" He repeated Bro's words. John had only just started catching his breath back when he then snorted and fell back into pained laughter.

Bro watched them, he had put his cap back on and readjusted his triangular shades. Picking up three bags in one hand and three in another Bro waited until they had some semblance of calm before speaking.

"C'mon I know my humour is amazing but we need to get back to our place before the apple juice goes warm." Dave and John leaned against each other, helping themselves up.

John nodded, subconsciously his hand slid down to entwine with Dave's. Dave smiled and pushed his sunglasses back up to the bridge of his nose, and tightened his grip on John's hand.

The three of them walked back to the apartment building, neither Dave nor John noticing they had not let go of each-others hands.

Bro smirked.

'You go, lil' man, win that Washington dork.' he thought in encouragement.

–

AND FINITO!

I liked that, did you like that? I liked that.

I wrote this quite quickly, and hopefully this is longer than last time.

Okaay, I hope you enjoyed this.

I will probably update soon, because I still have a lot of ideas for the next chapter.

Review, Fave, Follow.

Constructive criticism is appreciated, although flames will just be used to heat my laptop on cold winter nights.

Homestuck doesn't belong to me, it belongs to Sata- I mean, Andrew Hussie...

Killing off freaking everyone- "Grumble grumble grumble"

Byeeee!


	3. Chapter 3

John and Dave were sat on the couch, watching Bro as he methodically stuffed the fridge and cupboards. Sometimes cursing as a few smuppets he forgot were there fell from behind the doors.

"How the hell did I not notice there were so many freaking smuppets..." Bro grumbled to himself, glaring at the small pile in the middle of the kitchen. "You get ONE hobby then BAM suddenly it's everywhere." He sighed, picking them up and taking them to his room after he finished putting all of the food away.

When Bro closed the door behind him. Obviously to sort out the mess his room had become after collecting the smuppets from around the house. Dave turned to John grinning widely.

"Johnnyyyy..." He started. Shuffling closer to John who gulped nervously and watched Dave, who's teal hair fell over his face as he tilted his head cutely.

"Do you wanna play a game?" Dave giggled, face getting closer to John's.

"Errr... Sure! What kinda game?" John agreed. Smiling a little, overbite making it look even cuter to Dave. Who's eyes lit up with happiness and quickly grabbed John's shoulders.

"I want to play the pocky game!" Dave said loudly, John placed his hands on Dave's arms.

"Dave, you don't HAVE pocky..."John was glad, he didn't want to play such a weird game!

He wasn't a homosexual, he had told everyone dozens of times!

Dave frowned, but quickly got up, "I have an ideaaaa!" He danced to the kitchen, taking out a box of strawberries and a sharp knife then running to sit back down next to John. Who froze at the sight of said knife.

Dave opened the box, taking the knife and cutting off the green stems of the strawberries and putting them back into the box. He put the knife onto the lid that was set onto the table and placed the box between them.

"We'll play with strawberries instead! Hehehehe, I knew I was smart!" Dave giggled madly, watching as John went slowly pink and sagged in defeat.

"Ugh...fiine." John opened his mouth. Gently biting down onto the strawberry placed between his teeth to keep it in place. Blushing slightly harder when Dave bit onto the other end.

Dave felt excitement race through his body and make the jumbled thoughts in his head fly around even faster. He nibbled the strawberry growing closer to John who seemed to be frozen in place.

John's eyes were wide, oh god would Dave really-

Dave closed the distance, quickly slipping out his tongue to get what was left of the strawberry. Swiping against John's lips and teeth.

John shivered.

Yes, Dave would.

Dave smirked, ignoring the screaming and profanities of Original-Dave in the back of his head. Reaching to the box and grabbing a large strawberry, quickly pulling back and shoving it in his mouth. While John's was still opened slammed their lips together, passing the strawberry between them.

In the corners of John's mind he could hear himself shouting about not feeling this way about Dave. But the feel of the strawberry and tongue was muting his senses and making his brain all fuzzy.

Then Dave left the strawberry in his mouth and pulled back, grinning happily.

"That was fun!" Dave sung happily, taking a strawberry and biting into it.

"Wh-wha...DAVE!" John had regained his senses, and was gaping at Dave who was smiling like he was the cat that caught the canary.

"Hmmmmm?" Dave hummed teasingly, tilting his shades down and staring into John's bright blue eyes. "Yeaaa Johnny?"

"I-I am not a homosexual! Dave! You know that!" John squeaked indignantly, Dave giggled loudly.

"I knooow! It was just a game! We don't have to play any mooore!" Dave nodded to John, who sighed quietly in relief.

"Well, did I walk into an awkward situation." Bro's deep tenor was heard from the doorway to the kitchen. John whirled around in horror to see Dave's big brother/guardian leant against door with an upturned lip. Showing his amusement of the situation. "Want big bro to leave the little loves alone?" He teased, watching Dave hunch over in roaring laughter as John shrieked in panic.

"I-IT'S NOTHING LIKE THAT !" John waved his hands wildly in front of his face, feeling the burn in his cheeks.

Dave watched as John steadily grew even darker in the face. Wondering how red John could go before all the blood flooding to his face would cause him to faint.

He bit his lip, eyes sparkling as he watched John freak out and Bro watch the black haired boy in veiled amusement.

He wondered how red he could make John go before he started begg-

Dave hissed under his breath as a sharp spike of pain stabbed his head. Damn Original-Dave had flipped his shit and was now yelling at him. Slamming against the barrier and tearing at the seams.

Putting a hand to his forehead he closed his eyes, face now twisted into an angered frown. The sound of his pain had gained Bro's attention, who's senses were honed and trained to pick up small sounds.

"Lil' man, what's wrong?" He approached, John had turned to Dave, and is eyebrows had furrowed in concern.

"It's just fiiiiine.." Dave said, the slightly distorted notes in his voice made it seem rather creepy. And the light pink swirly eyes that were peeking out from behind his sunglasses were wide with rage and mania. "Give Davey-wavey a minute..." Bro hummed slightly, nodding and sitting next to Dave, watching him carefully.

John slowly sat on the other side of Dave. Slightly nervous at touching the trickster who had molested his mouth earlier. He went slightly redder at that thought, and placed a hand on his shoulder.

"Dave?" John's voice was gentle, and Dave latched onto it as he slammed the Original-Dave back behind the walls. Rebuilding them. Leaning back onto Bro, Dave peered up at John sleepily.

"Jooohn...nnyy, I feel ssooooo sleepy all of a suuuuddenn..." Dave's speech had become slightly slurred. The attack on Trickster-Dave's dominant mind had left him without energy. As he had used a lot of it getting Original-Dave back into the walls he had built.

Swaying Dave slid sideways and into Bro's chest, who frowned. Raising a hand to Dave's forehead, not warm, picking up a limp wrist and squeezing to check his pulse.

It was normal. Bro nodded, Dave was just tired. After what seemed like...

An attack? A spasm? Or was it Dave trying to regain control of his own body?

Bro hoped nothing too hectic would happen on this however long escapade with Trickster-Dave. Cause he swore Lil Cal was laughing at him whenever he walked into his room.

Oh geez, if he had to hear him giggle about his terrible luck ONE more time.

That stuffing was premium, but I have enough money to replace it, Bro thought menacingly.

John watched, concerned before relaxing slightly as Bro nodded to him. Slipping his arms around Dave and lifting him up, walking to Dave's room to set him down on the bed.

"He's okay?" John asked, just to make sure, as he followed behind Bro.

"Lil' man just got tired, no worries, just a lil' shuteye and he'll be up an' at it." Bro reassured the Washington dork.

John released a relieved sigh- that suspiciously sounded like "Pshchooo..." but...whatever. At least Dave was okay...

Minus the whole, Trickster crazy stuff...

And the fainting...

And the ki- John slapped himself in the face, to knock the thought out of his head, before pausing in horror as he realised.

He just slapped himself...

In front of Bro Strider...

Oh god. "You...alright?" Oh, great, now he almost wanted Bro to kick him out of the house for being an absolute bonkers nutcase.

"Oh- no I'm fine!" John chuckled nervously, scratching the back of his head.

Bro nodded, well, Dave's friends WERE strange...

He just hoped this one wasn't too bad.

–

Not as long as I had hoped.

But I wanted to give you some progress at least.

Real sorry for the wait but I hoped you liked it anway!

Reviews, constructive criticism, follows and faves are forever conserved in my thorny heart.

Flames just help me cook dinner.

See you next chapter!


	4. Chapter 4

Hemingway App makes your writing bold and clear.

Oh my gosh, 11 reviews in 3 chapters! Wow, that's awesome, from now on I'm gonna reply to reviews! Cause I love the support I'm getting it really makes me wanna update quicker!

I am going to be updating faster by the way, summer holiday is on the way and I really cant wait.

Rockband80: Thank yoou! And omg you call me Lil Bro that is awesome 3, I will keep going! Just you wait!

F4BP30PL3: Yay I did! Finally I updated! Sorry for the long wait! Hopefully I'll be quicker hahaha.

ShippingSeer: I love that you love this! And you have an awesome username, by the way, and I thank you for thinking that my story is cute. I can't believe people haven't thought of writing Trickster!Dave X John yet...

godgleHeadOtaku: Hehehe, I love flame repellent jokes a lot, it's awesome that I made up one that makes you think that!

Okay, that's all for now, I love your reviews and I really hope to get more this chapter!

So read on, enjoy, bla-de-bla- WAIT

I just want to say this, if you like Broadway Karkat... or John... or Dave... I will be including songs from them... Just a heads up, if you don't' feel free to skip it I don't mind.

"Demonic voice" OR DO I?!- Naaa, haha I don't.

Hope you like this chapter!

–

Trickster-Dave glared at Original-Dave. A bright pink sword with a strawberry shaped guard in his hand as he stood in front of Original-Dave.

"This is my body for now, I'M just ACTING on OUR feelings!" Trickster-Dave's voice was heavily distorted, like a scratched vinyl record. Far worse than in the real world, his body in Dave's mind fizzled and glitching. Original-Dave however was standing tall, wearing his God-Tier Knight of Time outfit. Aviator shades hiding the crimson rage from sight, but his lips were tugged into a deep frown and he was holding Caledscratch.

"Get your shitty juju influence the fuck out of my hella-fine body and stay the hell away from Egderp. Or do you want a piece of whoop-ass ownage on your glitch-ass?" Dave's voice was smooth, monotone, but even Trickster-Dave shivered at the dark anger in his words.

"MAAyBeeee you DIDN'T ReaLIZE WHAT i'm SA-SaaYING!" Trickster-Dave spoke, distortion becoming even more extreme with mania. Flipping the strawberry sword in hfromis hand, before catching it again. "I OWNnn this bOdy right now! AaanD aNY-ny-nyWAY... wE BOOOTH loooooooooo-lo-lo-VEE Joooohnny..." Trickster-Dave smirked, coming forward, twitchily tilting his head to the side. Original-Dave took a step back, disturbed at the sight of the Trickster's glitchy movement.

"You want to take a fuckin' bite out of John? You better recognize that even if you control MY body! That ain't lasting long, by the fuckin' way. That you are batshit crazy if you think you can do anything to him without me beating your ass outta the next timeline." Original-Dave snarled.

"Then Why-y-y-yyyy wOooont yOU ShArE himmmm?" Trickster-Dave came even closer. A wall erecting itself behind Original-Dave and trapping him as he backed up. A pink blade embedded itself into the wall next to Original-Dave's neck. "Yooou wi-w-w-wiiil noooOoot let MEEE HuRT JohnnNNyy...AnnDD we'l-l-l-llll haVeee him AaaaaAlll to OuRSeeeellves!" Trickster-Dave giggled madly. Coming very close to the other and licking his chin with a creepily long tongue that dripped with pink saliva.

Dave shuddered in horror, what the fuck was going on in his mind?

"No, he'll kill me, you're me, ain't you?" Dave started, wiping the discomfort from his voice, " I die, you die, if you don't fade away first." He plastered on a smirk as the Trickster paused, pink swirly eyes locking with his.

"WhaaAat? Noo, Johnn-n-nnyyy iSS tooooo gentle..." Trickster-Dave protested, what was Original-Dave talking about? Johnny-boy never would hurt Davey, he knew from the way Johnny-boy reacted to his flitations.

Without disgust, blushing like a virgin- well, he was one but nevermind- and all around cute homo who didn't even know it yet.

Didn't Dave see it? Obviously, Trickster-Dave could see it clear as day...

And his mind was jumbled up and glitchy.

Did Original-Dave really not notice it? A face splitting smirk crossed Trickster-Dave's face, that was interestiiing... Maybe he could use that. Even if he didn't last long enough to see John and Davey get together- there was a twinge of pain at the thought, but he brushed it away.

He'd be dead, and time would go on...Tick-tock, tick-tock, without him.

Trickster-Dave just knew he needed to leave his mark on the people around him. Otherwise he'd just be transferred to a different Dave one more time .

Again... and again... always fai- he shook his head vigorously. Shocking Original-Dave, who peered at the Trickster who seemed to be fighting with himself.

"I-Iiii'm wa-a-aking up..." Trickster-Dave breathed, eyes becoming heavy as he swayed. The strawberry sword disintegrated as he fell backwards, disappearing into the darkness. Leaving a swearing Original-Dave.

–

John was sat on the computer chair, browsing through the internet. Waiting for Dave to wake up, giving him time to think as well.

Why did Trickster-Dave make him feel so comfortable? Not as comfortable as normal Dave, but... Trickster-Dave just reminded him of a hyper teen. With homicidal thoughts and mania, John nodded to himself.

He always told himself that he wasn't homosexual. Maybe for fear of being hated by the people at school at first. Then maybe to avoid awkward situations with Karkat hateflirting.

But now, as he and the rest of the Sburb and Sgrub players had reached God-Tier. There was no point in going to school, as even if they had finished the game, they still lived in a version of it that was relatively peaceful. With the people around them being unaware they were even living in a game. And the 'monsters' really only being a mild nuisance with his and the other's powers.

Hell, even Caliborn had grudgingly agreed to live with them. After his defeat he had sense beaten into him and had turned 'relatively-neutral'.

John Egbert was homosexual, and he had no idea how to admit it, to himself or even to the people around him. Damnit it wasn't even a problem, Rose and Kanaya were together. So were Terezi and Vriska, Sollux and Karkat, Gamzee and Tavros, Mituna and Kurloz. Jake and Dirk, Roxy and Jane and a whole bunch of other people.

John hadn't had any idea he knew so many non-heterosexuals. Until Vriska sat him down and pulled out a list of 'Who's with who' so he didn't stay 'A completely o8livioooooooos moron.'

Seriously, was he like a non-hetero magnet? It was really awkward.

John's thoughts were broken when he heard a whine, and blankets shuffling. "Dave?" He turned, so see the teal-haired boy sit up, rubbing his eyes behind the pink heart-shaped sunglasses.

"Yeeaaaaaaa?" Dave trilled, head falling to the side as he smiled up at him. "Jooohnny?"

"You alright now?" John asked, getting up to sit beside Dave, who nodded quickly. Sliding forward to place his forehead against John's shoulder.

"Yooou...would never...kiiiillll me, right?" Dave whispered into his neck, nearly making John shiver. Before he realised what Dave was saying and pulled his head up to look into his eyes in shock.

"Kill you?! god, what are you asking me that for! Of course not! Never! If I hurt my best bro then I better go burn my Nic Cage posters because I wouldn't deserve that man's visage on my wall!" John replied in shock, gaping at Dave who started smiling. Coming closer to hug John tightly but loose enough so John didn't feel any strain.

"That's amaziing...Thank gooood.." Dave purred, wrapping lithe arms around John happily. Mentally sticking out his tongue at Original-Dave. Who was grumbling about how John's mind would soon change about that.

He knew John just as well as Original-Dave, but his different mind made it easier to see what John really felt...

Now if only he could get to two silly-billies to play house and kiss.

He snorted, peering at the grin John had cracking his face, the overbite making it look truly adorable and childish.

A spark of possessive envy ran through his body, that would never be truly his...

As this body really did belong to Dave Strider. Not Trick Dave Strider.

He was just a glitch in the game.

Dave sighed, tightening his hold on John, shuffling to sit against the wall. Pulling John into his lap and ignoring the surprised yelp of the black-haired dork.

As long as this lasted, he thought, tucking his chin into John's collarbone.

He would willing give the lovely boy over to Other Dave.

–

Oh my, I did this in one sitting, well that is surprising, this is kinda angsty :/ well. I am trying to build Trickster-Dave's character so he doesn't just seem like a giggly annoying glitchy Dave.

I want some sympathy from Original-Dave and John.

Hehehee... I might even have a plan for the whole 'fading away thing' hehehehehehe...

Ahem, not like I'M going to reveal anything yet! Better get theorising my dear detectives and spelunkers!

Hope you enjoyed this. Review, constructive criticism is appreciated and so are follows and favourites.

However, I shall collect flames to burn the pictures of JohnXVriska and KarkatxTerezi...

"Shudder"

Seeya next time!

Alkoi.


	5. Chapter 5

Hi! New chapter, I hope you like it!

Just finished my exams this year, 6 WEEKS FREEEEE!

Okay, I hope you like this chapter, and I will be updating faster and with longer chapters now!

Yay!

–

John, Dave and Bro had home-cooked mac'n'cheese ( Which, surprisingly to Bro, he had skill in cooking meals. ) and John and Dave sat in Dave's room, rearranging the room slightly so they could lay down John's futon to sleep in.

Bro had offered to set it up for them but Johm having become comfortable in the Strider home. Had awoken his stubborn and goofy personality, had stood up and said "As a prideful man I will do this myself!" And then meekly added "If that's alright..Bro."

Bro was okay with it, but jokingly warned John not to get 'all up and personal' with Dave in case he walked in. John was promptly red for the rest of dinner.

"Dave! Oh-WA-ACK!" John was about to complain about the floor that was basically made out of wires, but tripped on one that slightly stuck out.

"Woaaaaaa!" Dave caught John. Stepping up to keep John from falling over, grinning into his face wickedly "Waatch it the~re Johnny-boy! Don't wannnaaa be the damsell in diiiiistresss heeey?" Dave giggled. Watching as John quickly nodded, standing up straight and backing away carefully from the wires.

"Dave... I know that you LIKE the whole being so 'wicked cool I can walk across my room without tripping' shtick... But can I maybe...SUGGEST a rug?"

"Heheheeee, I guesss that's an ideaa!" Dave sung, grinning widely as he made his way to his computer. "Jooohn, my techie-glasses-things are over there, you can order whateeeeeever rug ya liiike!" He grinned, pointing over to his messy bed. Where a black pair of aviators with softly glowing apple signs on the lenses sat on one of the pillows.

John nodded slowly, peering at Dave curiously as he edged his way over to the bed. Grabbing the shades gently by the frames and swapping them for his glasses, his sight going slightly blurry. John had no IDEA where Dave had gotten them from, probably from Dirk as some present or something.

As John did what he wanted, Dave turned to his computer, it had already fired up and he already had someone pestering him...

How exciiiiiting! Dave hummed in interest, clicking onto Pesterchum. Absently raising his thumb to his mouth and chewing on the flesh there.

-tentacleTherapist [ TT ] began pestering turntechGodhead [ TG ] at 18:43 -

TT : Hello, Dave.

TG : hiiiiiiii! how are yoooou roooooooooooooseyyy hehehehee

TT : I am quite fine, how are you feeling? I heard that John is staying over your place?

TG : yeaaaaaaaaaaaa im amaaaaazing! its's great having johnny-boy over!

TG: i really dont want him to leaaaaave.

TT : I suppose that's understandable, to be honest I'm hoping you confess to him over the course of his stay.

TG : heeeeees right here roooseeeyyyy! hehehehe im wondering how hed react to me just grabbing him by the collar aaaaanndd

TG : taking a biiiiteee out of thaaaaat pretty

TG : little neck of hiiiis heheheheheheeee

TT : Dave, please don't attempt to harm John.

TG : oh noo iii said that

TG : iiii didnt mean tooo prooomise

TG : its just sooo tempting! ii almost cant contaaain myself

TT : Right, yet, should you want to court John's partnership.

TT : I would advise against said action.

TG : ooof course!

TT : Sorry, it seems that Kanaya needs my assistance with something.

TG : aaawww i guess thats alriiight

TG : byeeee heheheehehee

\- tentacleTherapist [ TT ] ceased pestering turntechGodhead [ TG ] at 18:49 -

Dave sighed, that was slightly anticlimactic. Not as interesting as he had hoped, but Rose had quelled some of his... instinctual urges. He didn't realise he had been chewing on his thumb until he tasted the coppery tang of blood. His eyes locked onto the drops of blood slipping from his thumb as he pulled it from his mouth. It was already healing but there was a lot of blood running down his hand now.

Oh...if he could just-

Ping!

Another pester? Who was it this time...ruining his thoughts. Disrupting them from the bloody cuisine he was so desperately imagining on his tongue. Hot and still fre-

Ping!

Argh...fiiine, Dave sighed, clicking the chumHandle of the one who was messaging him.

\- carcincoGeneticist [ CG ] began trolling turntechGodhead [ TG ] at 18:53 -

CG : HEY YOU CHUTEFUCKING DOUCHEBAG.

CG : GET YOUR SHITTY EXCUSE FOR A PINK WRINKLY MONKEY HERE THIS GRUBFUCKING MINUTE. YOU BETTER BE MONUMENTALLY GRATEFUL FOR MY GRACIOUS TIMEWASTING ON YOUR NUMBNUTS MORONIC SELF. I HAVE BETTER THINGS TO DO THAN SIT ON MY BULGE ALL FUCKING DAY WAITING FOR SOME NOOKWHIFFING GALLIAVANTING SCUM LIKE YOU. BUT YOU WOULDN'T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT TIMEWASTING WOULD YOU STRIDER. SINCE YOU OBVIOUSLY HAVE SO MUCH OF IT ON YOUR INEXPERIENCED WRIGGLER HANDS.

TG : aaaawww kaaarklless i didnt know you were so concerned with taaaaaalking to me

TG : iiiiiii thought you hated little old me?

CG : OH MY GOD. NO YOU INSUFFERABLE PRICK! I DO NOT GIVE ONE SHIT FOR YOUR TINY HUMAN BRAIN DROOLING NUGATORY TEXT INTO MY ALREADY AGONIZED LOOKSTUBS. AS I SIT HERE THANKING ANY AND ALL OMNIPOTENT BEINGS PROVEN FICTICIOUS THAT I CANNOT SMELL YOUR MOOBEAST-SHIT WITH MY ENTERNALLY THANKFUL SNIFFNODES. OR HAVE YOUR GRATING VOICE MANGLE MY AURICULAR SPONGE CLOTS.

TG : whaaaaoooo karkitty you suuuuure are fired up hehehehehee

TG : whaat did ya neeeeed me for anywaaaay?

CG : I HAVE BEEN INFORMED OF YOUR WITLESS CONSUMPTION OF A PARTICULAR FUCKING SWIRL LOLLIPOP. ARE YOU ALWAYS SUCH A DULLARD OR DID YOUR SUPREME HUMAN-LUSUS-THING YOU CALL 'BRO' NOT INFORM YOU OF THAT HANDY FUCKING RULE OF...

CG : OH I HAVE SEEMED TO HAVE FORGOTTEN SUCH AN IDIOT-PROOF RULE! OH. WAIT A FUCKING MINUTE MY THINK-PAN HAS PHENOMENALLY RECALLED SUCH ARRANGEMENT OF FORBIDDING WORDS!

CG : DON'T TALK TO STRANGERS, DON'T TAKE FOOD FROM STRANGERS, DONT FOLLOW STRANGERS!

TG : iiii doooont have a clue whyyyy your sooo caught up!

TG : its not like it can be aaaavoided noooow hehehehehee

CG : UNFORTUNATELY. NOW I HAVE TO WAIT UNTIL SOMEONE, ANYONE AROUND HERE CAN HOLD ANY INSIGHTFUL CONVERSATION. AND THE ONLY AVAILABLE SENTIENCE IN THIS PESTILENTIAL HIVE IS AN INTOXICATED CLOWN-FACED SUBBJUGULATOR. THAT WAS PREVIOUSLY MY FRIEND.

CG : BECAUSE FOR SOME INSCRUTABLE REASON EVERYONE HAS GONE OFF TO ENJOY THE SPECTACLES OF THIS ABHORRENT WORLD. AND EGBERT DECIDED TO TAKE UP LIVING WITH YOUR SECTIONABLE BEING.

TG : iiis the only reason you caaame to me was to moooaaan?

TG : iiim soooo bored.

TG : if you arent going to heeeelp then goooo aaawaaaaayyyyy

CG : YOUR ALMOST AS BAD AS YOURSELF WHEN YOU ARENT INEBRIATED ON SUGARY CONCOCTIONS. ONLY YOU HAVE AN EXCEEDINLY ANNOYING TEXT QUIRK. AND A THINK-PAN ACHE INDUCING PSYCHEDELIC FREAKOUT OF PASTEL COLOUR PAINTING YOUR ABSOLUTELY FATUOUS WORDS.

CG : WAIT A SECOND.

CG : NO, ACTUALLY YOU ARE SIGNIFICANTLY WORSE THAN YOUR NORMAL SELF.

TG : you are reaaaaally mean

TG : iiim much better than dave

CG : RIGHT, I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHY THE EVERLOVING FUCK I WANTED TO TALK TO YOU. IT WASN'T LIKE I DIDN'T REALIZE THAT YOU WEREN'T A TERRIBLE SOURCE OF CONVERSATION. ESPECIALLY SINCE YOUR INTELLIGENCE ONLY STRETCHES AS FAR AS WHERE THAT GRUB-SAUCE YOU LOVE SO FUCKING MUCH IS POSITIONED INSIDE OF THE THERMAL HULL.

CG : I'M LEAVING, HAVE A FUCKING TERRIFIC DAY, YOU ANNOYING, BRAINLESS, BULDGESMOKING DUMBSHIT.

TG : yooou tooo karkleees!

\- carcinoGeneticist [ CG ] ceased trolling turntechGodhead [ TG ] at 19:01 -

Dave spun his chair around to look at John, putting his chin in the palm of his hand as his arm was propped up on his knee. Smiling as he saw John pull off the glasses.

"Did ya get aa ruuuug?" Dave crooned, watching as John blushed slightly.

"Yeah, it's red and blue and it looks awesome and-" John was starting to run his mouth, before Dave speedily flew over to him. Sitting next to him and placing a finger to his lips.

"Red and bluueee? Our coloooours... How niiiice of you." Dave giggled, but John wasn't focused on him but the blood that had slightly dried on his hand.

"What happened to your hand?" John said, concern soaking his words, gently grabbing the appendage.

Dave smiled slightly wider, cheeks perpetually hurting, but still smiling. John was so gentle he just wanted to wrap him up in blankets and keep him from everything that could damage him...

Maybe he could even... Dave breathed out slowly, watching as John leaned over to grab the bag he had left on the floor by the bed. Grabbing a pack of wet-wipes and pulling one out.

John returned the pack of wet-wipes to his bag and started to clean the blood from Dave's hand.

"What happened?" He asked softly.

"I was chewing my thumb..." Dave replied distantly, staring at the bright blue eyes locked onto his hand. Now only slightly bleeding compared to the mangled flesh his thumb had been. "It tasted...good..." He added dazedly.

John started slightly, right... Tricksters were instinctively cannibalistic. Dave was... a shiver of fear went down his spine.

"Try not to next time... okay?" John requested gently, throwing the bloody wet-wipe into the bin and getting up from the bed.

Dave nodded, refocusing and getting up to help John lay the futon down on the floor after clearing a space for it.

"Okay, good!" John nodded, clapping his hand together and grinning happily.

Dave giggled, floating next to John happily, arms wrapped around his knees.

"What do you wanna dooo nooow?" Dave asked John, who struck a goofy thinking pose, a hand holding his chin as he 'hmmmmm'ed.

"You got any movies?" John grinned at Dave, who smiled excitedly as he pointed to the tall collection of DVD's.

"Yuuuup!"

They had situated themselves on the chair so John, he smaller of the two would sit in between Dave's legs on the large gaming chair. After putting in the movie – Tenacious D, the Pick of Destiny – they had settled in to watching an awesome Jack Black film.

They had gotten through about 3 movies, and now it was about 1 o'clock in the morning, and both of them were very tired. John shuffled carefully over to the futon, lying down and getting comfortable.

"Dave?" John called, pulling the covers further over him, it was cold season in Texas where Dave was living, and it was chilly.

"Yeeeees?" Dave cooed out softly, half focused on quelling the urges that were stroking the insides of his head.

"Good night, Dave." John said, placing his glasses in a glasses case and placing it on the pillow next to him.

"Nightie niight."

–

Dave shivered, hands shaking as he sat on the floor, a board and his strawberry sword in front of him.

He needed to do this, to get rid of it, adrenaline would help...

It needed to...blood had to be spilt, but it had to be his, not John's definitely not John's.

Dave breathed out slowly, taking the strawberry sword by the hilt. Lying his hand on the board he spread his fingers out as far as possible.

He remembered, Bro told Original-Dave about the game, even did it in front of him. Saying how the adrenaline would help keep you from hitting your fingers.

He even remembered the song...

"Now there's an old tradition

A game we all can play

You start by getting liquored up and sharpening your blade

You take a shot of whiskey

You take your knife and pray

You spread out your fingers and this is what you say!"

Dave grinned, eyes now maniacal as he sung softly, raising his sword, then stabbing it down, between his fingers in a rhythm. ( For an idea, search on youtube for Knife Game Song. )

"Oh, I have all my fingers

The knife goes Chop Chop Chop

If I miss the spaces between

my fingers will come off

And if I hit my fingers, blood will soon come out

But all the same I play this game, cause that's what's it's all about!"

Dave didn't notice. But the sound of him singing and the thud of the sword hitting the board had woken John up, and he groggily shuffled in his futon. Opening his eyes blindly and slowly opening the glasses case to put his glasses on.

"No you can't use a pencil. You cannot use a pen,

The only way is with a knife when danger is your friend

And some may call it stupid, some may call it dumb

But all the same we play this cause it's so damn fun!"

John fumbled with his glasses, putting them on the right way he looked in the direction of the noise. Gasping quietly as he watched Dave stab the spaces in between his fingers. Singing the disturbing song that disrupted his sleep.

"Oh! I have all my fingers

The knife goes Chop Chop Chop

If I miss the spaces in between

My finger will come off

But all the same I play this game, cause that's what's it's all about!"

Dave's grin was disturbingly wide, cheeks hurting and eyes glimmering with bloodlust and mania.

The stabbing got even quicker, Dave's singing doing the same. John was fumbling with the futon covers, kicking them off panicking and crawled quickly over to Dave.

"Oh! Chop! Chop! Chop! Chop! Chop! Chop! Chop!

I'm picking up the speed

And if I hit my finger

Then my hand will start to bleed!"

Dave went to slam the knife down in the space behind his thumb, but was startled by John. Wide-eyed and scared rushing towards him, the knife going off course and-

Snikt!

Thud..

Drip...Drip...Drip...

–

HOPE YOU LIKED IT :D.

Loved doing this chapter, hope you will like the next one!

That will be out soon!

Rate and review! Constructive criticism appreciated.

Flames will help warm my sausage rolls in the oven.

Alkoi~


	6. Chapter 6

uys! Do you hate me for leaving that cliffy? I hope you don't, I'm sorry for taking so long, turns out GCSE's and

F4BP30PL3 : Oh my god you were my first review on that chappy and you said exactly what I was hoping people to say! Yes, Trickster Dave had a little accident! "Snort"

Clench : Thank you for thinking that! I really appreciate it. I hope you like this chapter and I think you are awesome. Just like all my other reviewers and followers and favoriters and what-not and some-such! :.

Mage-Of-Hope14 : Here is more, more is here, I guess you enjoyed my cliffhanger? I was wondering what leaving it like that would do :).

P0ck3yM0nk3y : Another one asking for more! I'm gonna give you that, and I also plan on doing some spin-off oneshots soon!

Hope you enjoy this chapter, Read on and stuff.

–

John shrieked in terror, the sword had stabbed right through the middle of Dave's hand. Blood gushing from the wound and pooling around on the wooden board, Dave whined, looking at the blade embedded in the back of his hand.

"It's bleeeeeeeding~" He smirked. Leaving the sword in his hand he used his other hand to scoop up blood, starting to giggle crazily. "Blood...Dave's blood...Johnny-boy it aiin't yours I'm sooo haaaaaappyyy heheheheheee..." Dave hunched over, howling laughter that was getting louder and louder.

"Dave! Dave oh god your bleeding- DAVE WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT TO YOURSELF!" John screamed at him, suddenly grasping Dave by the shoulders, who froze mid laugh.

"Didn't wanna huuurt...you Johnny-boy..." Dave hissed into John's ear as he leaned forward, ignoring the way his impaled hand shifted on the blade. "Gotta bleed something oooout! Hehehehehee... Didn't wan' it to be you darliiiin' heheheheee... wanted to rip and maim and EAT and oooohhh... Johnny-boy you wouldn't beeeeelieeeve the day I've had tryin'na stop myself from..." Dave breathed in John's scent, face near his neck "Hurtin' somethin'..." He started giggling again.

John froze, oh god...

His fault...

Dave hurt himself to stop him from hurting others, he was hurting Dave just by being around him. What if it evolved into something even worse? Something like... Murdering other people to keep himself from killing John?

From killing Bro?

If that happened then it would definitely be John's fault, no doubt and no one else to blame he thought.

But first, he had to get Dave help-

SLAM.

"The HELL is goin' on- Dave?!" A familiar baritone sounded from the doorway, were the door had been slammed open. "Oh christ- Dave...what the fuck have you done.." Bro was at the doorway, and then he was by them. Swiftly pulling the sword out and cradling the hand. Looking around Bro grimaced at the unwashed shirts lying around.

Not clean enough for bandages.

"Come with me." He said to John shortly, who nodded. Bro picked Dave up in his arms without acknowledging the yelping and giggling of his crazy little brother.

Quickly making his way to the kitchen, Bro set Dave onto the kitchen counter. Sternly ordering John to keep pressure on the wound after tying a tea-towel around Dave's hand. Who was still dizzily giggling.

John stared up into Dave's pastel pink eyes, which locked onto his blues and stared, giggles slowly dying down into a slow grin.

Bro came back with a roll of bandages and antiseptic cream, settling next to Dave and John, gently prying Dave's hand from John. Untying the tea towel and reaching over to the antiseptic cream, yet paused when he saw the state of Dave's hand.

It wasn't all the way through his hand anymore, but still was a very deep cut. He squeezed a little antiseptic onto his fingers, going to rub it in as painlessly as he could. Dave whined at the sting, other hand clenching as he stared at Bro.

He hadn't had Bro care for his wounds in so long. He had almost forgotten the calloused fingers and soft handling, his bloodlust rapidly faded. Leaving smothering guilt.

"Johnny...big Bro." Dave said, voice very similar to the original Dave's voice, John's eyes went from his hand to his face, wide with surprise.

Bro flicked eyes up to meet with Dave's, who ducked his head slightly.

"I'm sorry.." He said, hand twitching slightly as Bro started to wrap his hand in bandages, tight enough but not enough to hurt. "I didn't want to hurt you... I didn't wanna make you sad..." He whimpered again, eyes starting to water.

Bro finished bandaging the wound, standing up and pulling both John and Dave into one armed hugs.

"You two went through a ton of shit, and I get that you barely told me any of what actually happened. But Dave...God dang it lil' brother, you don' go scaring me and your John here like that, when you wan' to spill blood you come straigh' to me." He tightened his hold on Dave and glared down and them both, John gaping up at the guardian. "You got that lil'man?"

Dave nodded, eyes blurry as he wiped the tears, snuggling tighter into his brothers hold.

John watched Dave, blushing when he reached out and wrapped his arms around John, hugging him as he snuggled into Bro.

"And you, blue-eyed wonderboy." Bro started, looking at John. "When he starts to get all odd or anythin' you drag his lilly white ass back to me, all right? He doesn't want you gettin' hurt and I don' want you to either." Bro stated, shocking John.

"Wha...oh...uh, okay." John scratched his cheek, squirming slightly as Dave's grip tightened.

Bro let them go, turning to pick up the antiseptic and the bandages, returning them from where they came and glancing at his watch.

"It's nearing 5 in the morning." Bro grumbled, reaching up to rub his eyes under his shades. "Way too early for anything right now... I'm going to bed, stay up or go to bed too, just don't be too loud." He yawned quietly, walking back to his room, leaving Dave and John in the kitchen.

After the click of Bro's door signified him going into his room, John stepped back from Dave and grabbed his shoulders.

"You don't do that again, Dave..." John's frown softened, eyes going slightly sad and his hands sliding from Dave's arms.

"I'm reaaaaally sorry..." Dave whined softly, crossing his arms and looking down guiltily. "It's so hard not to..."

John sighed, nodding and gently hugging Dave for a moment.

"It's fine now, Dave, let's get back to bed huh?" Dave nodded with a bright smile. Slipping his fingers between the other's and intertwining their hands.

"Uh-huh." He laughed cheerfully. John's stomach twisted at how Dave had instantly gone back to how he was before he almost turned his hand into shish kebab.

They returned to Daves room, carefully traversing the wires to the resting places. Dave and John had ended up snuggled up into each other, as John was afraid of what Dave could do if he woke up before John did.

Dave curled his arms around John, nuzzling into him with a happy smile.

"Night night Johnny John John." He hummed, and John smiled slightly.

"Sleep tight, Dave." He replied, closing his eyes and wrapping his arms around Dave as well.

Dave sunk into sleep, and he frowned, it was HIM again, uurgh...

He twisted and turned in the darkness, feeling as if he was falling but also enveloped by water. Opening his eyes slowly he saw the Original Dave standing on a soft red platform glowing in the darkness . With darker red paths leading off into the black.

He flipped to land gently on his feet, electrical buzzing as his visage glitched and pixelated. Limbs twitching unnaturally, the other was stood still and silent with crossed arms. Mouth slightly tipped down into a frown.

"You skewered yourself to stop yourself from hurting John." Dave pointed out, voice sharp, the other laughed distortedly. Nodding with jerky movements of his head.

"Ye-y-y-yeaaaaaaaa-aaaaaAAH. Rrrreeally Daaa-aaa-a-a-ave, you're trus-ss-s-s-ssshhhhhzzt in me is hoooooooo—ooooooOOOOOORIBLE!" His voice was like a grating remix, pitches clashing and jumping around with a dissonant ring. Sounding like a corrupted audio-file. With the way some of his syllables repeated, stretched, became loud or soft or disturbed.

"No shit you freaky game remnant, why the hell should I trust a glitch of a game that ruined all of the lives of the people who've played it. Fuck, even the game was messed up by your kind of assholes that's how fucked up you are.* Dave retorted. Taking a step back with slight fear of how... wrong, the other just seemed.

Trickster Dave shook his head vehemently. But sometimes- like a repeating video the movement jumped or reversed.

"Ne-n-n-n-n-n-nevVEER! Jo-jooooooooooohnny BOY is ssssssssomeone I C-C-C-C-C-C-aaaaaaaant hurt! Noot ev-v-v-v-ver!" He looked genuinely upset, and had to take in deep shaking breaths.

"What the fuck does that mean?" Dave's expression of disdain twisted, and Trickster Dave sighed. With it repeating a few times before he smiled slowly. Mouth cracking open into a cheek-splitting ear to ear grin, but his eyes were filled with sadness.

"I've g-g-g-g-g-goooonnnne so lONG jujjjumping froommmmm dimenssssion to diMENsiON m-m-m-my or-original John..." He seemed to deflate, almost sinking.

Dave's eyes widened behind his shades as he realized...

This... wasn't just a glitch, it was... it was a doomed Dave. Who had gone insane and went trickster. Who had started hopping timelines and dimensions in a desperate attempt to..

Attempt to what?

What did he mean by his Original John? What happened to John in his timeline? He blanched as the worst case scenarios rolled through his head.

Trickster Dave covered his face with his hands, starting to cry softly, shoulders shaking. "I-I-I d-d-d-didn't WANT HIm to di-di-die... th-th-t-t-they all diED! IIII c-couldn't sto-st-st-stop it-t-t-t..." He hunched over, digging his fingers into his face and letting out loud sobs. "I-I-I-I WANTED THEM TO LIVE! B-b-b-but... th-th-then... THeeeeN he made me... ma-a-a-a-ade me staaaaRRT g-g-going through d-d-dimensions! M-m-mAAAADE me-e-eee take those Dave's over.. had to give the-the-them h-h-h-h-h-h-happy endings..." He started to shake even harder, sinking to his knees and hugging himself.

Original Dave stared in silent shock... this... this 'glitch' wasn't a glitch at all.. he didn't even want to be in his body...

"I w-w-want my Johnny ba-a-ack... I-I d-d-dON'T want to g-g-g-g-g-give YOU A happy en-en-n-n-d-d-ding...w-when IIIII can-n-n-nt get my ooooowNNN... " He choked out, clutching himself. "I just want it to end..."

Dave walked forwards. Slowly reaching out to the crying Trickster, and lowered himself down to hesitantly wrap his arms around the other. Who stiffened in surprise, going quiet and still.

"Shit... if you just told me this before... I'd have helped you, fuck, I wouldn't have tried to attack you so much." He muttered, admonishing the other who clung onto him, sniffling.

"I d-d-on't like... t-talLKING ab-b-b-bout it..." He muttered back in reply, and Dave nodded.

"Yeah... I understand."

Did you like it?

I am so sorry it took so long to get out.

It's kind of a problem huh?

Okay, so well I hope you liked the cliffy in the last chapter, I like the way I finished in this.

Well, I hope to see you in the next chapter!

Alkoi.


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